What not to do during a divorce

baymule said:

Are you out of love with him yet? Whoever he once was, he is no longer that person. Time for you to get deeply, deeply, and CALMLY angry. Do not knuckle down to him. Kudos to you for not caving in. What a selfish jackass.

That sounds like a nice truck. You need to keep that. I'd find a family member to hide it for me or it could disappear while you were gone or asleep.

I bet you are tired of crying, tired of the hurt, tired of the games he is playing. You are the only one who is in control of you. When you let him make you cry, he is taking control and you need to get it back. You certainly don't owe him anything. Be strong. We are here for you to vent when you need to.

I'd sure like to whup his worthless A$$ for you and stomp a mudhole in his face.

I despise my ex. I will attend his funeral so I can spit in the coffin and I will go piss on his grave. yeah, I don't like him.

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I agree. Hide that truck. Dont let him intimidate you. If I were closer Id help kick his butt, too.

not only hide it, but if it ends up missing report it stolen and list him as the primary suspect.

sorry, divorces can get messy.

baymule said:

I'd sure like to whup his worthless A$$ for you and stomp a mudhole in his face.

I despise my ex. I will attend his funeral so I can spit in the coffin and I will go piss on his grave. yeah, I don't like him.

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LOL....... Baymule, remind me to NEVER make you angry at me!

I'm almost afraid to show my face in this thread. For my part, I'd rather stick my head in a hornet nest than pi$$ off DW. She is a sweet lady, but she also has a machete, and knows how to use it. She would probably cry as she chopped me into little pieces.

Divorce is never easy, even if it is "amicable". Over the years, I've had to watch most of my friends & family separate after many years together. That always leads to the awkward situation of friends, family, and children being pulled into "choosing sides". Divorce tends to amplify the bad side of good people... or maybe it just exposes it.

@murphysranch I agree with those who have stated that you should hide the truck - and other assets as well. Those who exhibit underhanded behavior are unlikely to stop after just one attempt.

@Zeedman, yes, i've similar feelings, having witnessed my own parents divorce along with enough others... one reason why the topic of marriage isn't one that is popular with me - i'm glad others can manage it, i'm not sure i can.

As I understand it, he has the truck. Otherwise the dealership would not trade.

Let her lawyers go after any and all assets he might have. In USA, women usually walk away with more assets than men. Does alimony still apply? Understand IF children involved but otherwise an archaic law that needs to be destroyed. That being said, doesn’t mean he isn’t a bad individual and not worth crying over. Set a new goal in life and move on.

seedcorn said:

As I understand it, he has the truck. Otherwise the dealership would not trade.

Let her lawyers go after any and all assets he might have. In USA, women usually walk away with more assets than men. Does alimony still apply? Understand IF children involved but otherwise an archaic law that needs to be destroyed. That being said, doesn’t mean he isn’t a bad individual and not worth crying over. Set a new goal in life and move on.

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alimony and child support laws vary by state as also does the division of assets. if you are worried about such things you do your homework, get a prenup or you don't get married.

I don't know why people have to be so hateful in a divorce. It's over. Move on. It seems there is one, sometimes both, that make it into a war.

Maybe skip arbitration and find a lawyer that will go for the jugular.

Oregon, like many other states, is a "fair and equitable" state, much like a community property state. Our lists of assets must equal each other on both sides. Its also a no fault state.

I paid for an appraisal of this home as if it were finished up with all the remodeling, especially since the appraiser could see the $10K in brand new items out in the garage waiting for the said remodeling. It came in about $45K less than I had hoped. I do not want to split apart my retirement fund to give him some money to balance our asset lists.

Oh but wait! There's more! In December, he drove 16 hours to LA to purchase a 2013 BMW535I for his honey. I got their gas bills on the way down, the $1200 he paid for the hotel while they were there, and I "see" his $16,050 auto loan on his credit report with a CU. He owes me that money and more for what he spent on our Credit cards.

I don't get mad. But I'll get even, sadly. I do know how to find out 90% of what he's up to....I have my ways.....and it stymies him about how much I know. hahahahaha

Bay: I will forgive him someday. Yes, I still love him, but I will not let a hole in my heart fester like I see it happened with my Mother. She still hates the woman my Dad left her for after 35 years of marriage. Daddy has been gone for 18 years, and Mother still talks about that lady. Gawd....Get over it Mother.