This reminds me of a brilliant red mum I bought once. It was so full of blooms for many months. Then winter came and all the flowers withered and it dried up into some brown stems. I thought it was dead. Well, I left it in its pot until spring came along. Around March I saw some little...
That's awesome that you are having such a great cuke harvest! Have you tried dipping them in high quality blue cheese dressing? Once you try this, you will be a slave to growing cucumbers!
I heard of people throwing rocks in the windows of cars in these situations to keep the owners from trying to sell their ruined cars without disclosing what happened. Maybe there is some hope in humanity? Maybe it's that?