Worried About Dad

digitS'

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things we didn't think twice about doing 10 years ago ... hopefully we are all smart enough to realize when it finally catches up to you.

Annette
I'm thinking twice ... remember it is "we ... us." It's not just catching up to "you." It's "us."

I'm having so much trouble with my legs. I didn't read this thread this morning; didn't want to think all day about my 98 year old dad and wonder how my brother is getting along with him ...

NyBoy's father's problem may be one I face. The last few days, the weakness in my legs has been really bothering me. This afternoon, I thought about what I would say to the MD if I go in. I'm afraid it will really shorten my life if I cannot walk.

That might be a lot of it, NyBoy. Do or die. Motivation comes by deciding what needs to be done. I'm passing the time when it is what I just have fun doing. There are things I have set up thru the years that result in a need. Of course, some are very basic like preparing a meal, washing clothes, etc. Others are mowing the lawn, tending the garden -- it's all, almost enuf! Do it, or die. If I can't walk ...

Steve
 

journey11

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I think there is certainly something to be said for just keep on keeping on. Staying active and busy does lead to a longer life. Our bodies were made for work. To lie down and quit will take years off. @aftermidnight , you sound like both my grandparents and my neighbors who are in their mid-80s. Some days I swear they could work circles around me! I've never thought of washing my ceilings, but I do vacuum the dust bunnies off them from time to time. Does that count? ;)
 

Beekissed

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I have a climber too, NY. Nothing can keep that woman off the roof or ladders. My sibs pull me aside and tell me to keep her from climbing ladders, painting, patching the roof, etc. I tell them, "YOU keep her from doing it...go ahead." They just laugh and back off.

Her theory is that a body in motion stays in motion. I'm a nurse, so I figure if she falls or collapses while working in the hottest part of the day, I can probably do as much as anyone to keep her comfortable until we can patch her up.

There is such a thing as quality of life and your dad and my mother are going for that. I say, "Let 'em." I'd rather they do that than sit around and die from inactivity. That ain't livin' at all.

My dad is in a nursing home due to advanced dementia, he's 85 yrs old. The man walks constantly and, as he walks, he works with his hands...sometimes he pulls down the curtains or fiddles with the things on the desk or med carts. I know what he's doing...in his mind he's still on this homestead, working and walking this land.

They try to get him to sit down and rest but he doesn't understand their words and he must keep moving. They express concern that he is wearing himself out and may fall...I say, "Let 'em." He's doing what makes him happy and if he gets hurt doing that, so be it. His choice and who in the world can stop him? The man is strong as an ox. As long as he keeps walking, that body is staying fit and will experience far less problems than if he's sitting all the time.

NY, I'd just let him go and be there to pick up the pieces when he needs you. It's his life and he isn't a child, so let him go through it as best he can.
 

aftermidnight

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@journey11 I just wash the kitchen and bathroom ceilings one or twice a year, all the others get a lick and a promise with the vacuum and only if I see a cobweb, dust bunnies are counted as family pets in our house :).
@digitS' know what you mean about the legs letting you down, I started losing the strength in mine years ago but the odd thing is there are times when they don't give me any problems at all and then there are times when the only way I can go any distance is with a walker. I've had cat scans and ex-rays, nothing shows up other than normal wear and tear:idunno. I refuse to sit in a chair and do nothing, I just concentrate on the things I can do, although cleaning the oven is fast becoming a pain you know where. I was talked into buying a steam clean oven, they are as useless as t*ts on a bull.

About two months ago my doctor suggested I try glucosamine, I don't know if it's making much of a difference with the legs but I've not taken anything for back pain for a couple of weeks now, so it must be doing some good.
My biggest problem is the summer sun and heat, neither agrees with me so I don't get much done outside in the summer :(. DH mows the lawn and does a lot of the watering for me which is a big help, I try to get most of the weeding done before the heat hits and then the plants have to fend for themselves until it cools off.
I do much better when it's on the cool side, I can get a lot done then. DH is just the opposite, can't take the cold or even cooler temps. I can be outside in a t-shirt and DH is all bundled up and has his long johns on. In the winter he likes the thermostat set around 78 and I would be very happy at 68 or cooler, I'm so glad I don't have a heat register in my gal cave, if it's still too warm for me I'll open the window a crack.
Annette
 
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Larisa

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My mother was a very active woman. She has 73 years, but she never believed. She always says that she feels 30 years. She was surprised when she sees herself in the mirror. However, this did not prevent her broken arm 3 years ago when she was doing regular maintenance work in the house. In the spring she underwent surgery on his eyes, and doctors recommended to restrict movement. But she bought new curtains, and began to self-update the ceiling in his country house. Dad can not help it, it was a bad move. I tried to dissuade her, but she does not listen. We recently brought their children to stay for a week. I saw the ceiling ... This is some kind of horror ... But my mother glowed with happiness. (The only benefit from poor eyesight). If you replace all the bad words that were in my opinion, by ***, it looks like this: Mom ******** you have to take***** ****care of the health of . But out loud I only left to say: "Mom - you are an amazing woman!"
 
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Gardening with Rabbits

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She was surprised when she sees herself in the mirror.

I was looking at DS's birthday pictures one day and there was one with DS and I said who is that old lady and it was me. I could not believe it. Just a side of my face, but I could not believe it was me.
 

Gardening with Rabbits

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DH is a climber too with brain tumors and medicine that says may make dizzy. He is not going to stop. He goes up on the roof and climbs the ladder. I do not even try to stop him. I do try to stay home. Hopefully, the roof is fixed and no more leaks and he stays off when it starts snowing. He works and if he cannot work, I don't think he wants to live. He cannot sit still. He does not have hobbies. He does not read. He finally has got where he reads news on his computer. He does realize about hydration and tries to do watch that. He will work until he drags himself almost to bed, totally exhausted and takes 2 days to recover or a week.
 
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