Dad starts his chemo and radiation tomorrow. It's gonna be on from there, a marathon for the next 6 weeks. I am not getting any volunteering from my siblings to help drive him there (an hour and 15 minute drive for me.) So, I hope he writes them out of the will...LOL, but seriously!
We had a horrible day yesterday, Easter Sunday. His mom came to visit and brought 3 other family members, plus his half-sister's fiance. And insisted we all show up with our children all dressed up for pictures. I didn't realize Dad didn't want them to come, and I feel guilty because I should have foreseen that this would be too much for him. He completely shut down and was UNpleasant, to say the least. He refused to be in any family pictures and was ready to tear loose on his step-dad for insisting. I was so worn out time I made it home.
So Dad is really anxious and dreading the treatments, but he is also worried about the tumor growing in there. He refused to eat all day yesterday, but did finally eat a good supper when I brought him some this evening. He had settled down a lot. Had a fall today and bruised his hip and shoulder too (tripped over something...Parkinson's.) We talked a little about things. I tried to be as comforting and encouraging as I could. I think it helped some. He's felt pretty well physically now that he's recovered from the surgery and blood clot. He is just in a dark valley right now. This is undoubtedly hard.
I am coping pretty well myself. I do better when he is feeling more positive though. He can throw me for a loop when he has these moods, but I've found a lot of comfort in alone time (driving to and fro mostly) singing and praying and it gets my mind back to where it needs to be.
I haven't started my tomatoes or anything yet. Did get my pruning done finally. I had lost the thermostat to my heat mat and finally found it today and was so happy I could have cried. If I have to buy plants, it's not the end of the world, I guess. I do want to at least have a small garden to occupy myself this summer. I need it for therapy!