Garden humor thread..

[baymule]

 

[journey11]

This thought has definitely crossed my mind before. Not *every* houseplant...but many!

 

[Chickie'sMomaInNH]

i've wondered about house plants with me too. i can grow all sorts of stuff outside that bloom & produce nice things. give me a houseplant known to produce flowers and it doesn't survive long enough to rebloom. somehow i've kept alive 1 African Violet for about 10 years, it has bloomed on occasion when i seem to starve it of water for a couple weeks then notice i've been ignoring it. i have 2 christmas cacti that i've kept for about 7 years and i've only seen it bloom 3 times in my life. once at the apartment the year after it was given to us, a couple years later when we got our 1st house, and last winter at this house. i have a couple spider plants but those don't make showy flowers but they have bloomed on occasion.

orchids hate me. amaryllis fear me!

 

[journey11]

I've done alright with the Christmas cacti. They are pretty resilient. So many other things have not been so lucky, cuttings particularly, and my poor sad epiphylums that I've had to trim back drastically time and time again because they got all abused, ratty-looking and ugly (and will never bloom at this rate!) Partly they suffer because we have dry heat from the wood stove in the winter, and partly because I can never remember to water them! Out of sight, out of mind.

 

[Pulsegleaner]

I think it must be something common to most of us. Out of the literally dozens of orchids I have had over the years, at least 2/3 never lived past a month after I bought them and only ONE every flowered after the initial one in it's tribute however, that one bloomed about once a month for several years (that species must not be very finicky about conditions) and had I not gotten negligent and let it dry out, I fully assume it would still be growing and flowering now.

actually that seems to be the story with a lot of the stuff. It's hard for me to get an Indoor plant up and running, but the ones that do often last a damn long time defined as "until I forget to water them for a few months) The downside of that of course, is that when that does happen, I can't just get another of the same species, it seems to be an individual to individual thing.

As it stands now, the oldest one is probably the "what is it" which is now going on two years and still flowering (for a weed it's seems unusually hardy) (you'd think by now I'd have gotten some clue as to what it is, I've really got to send a cutting to the ag station). Probably followed by the rose apple seedlings (which are mostly notable for being absolutely incredibly resistant to water stress, I've forgotten to water them for months at a time and they don't even notice (and no they aren't cacti or something else water storing)

 

[Nyboy]

For the past 5 years I always have a orchid in flower on my desk. The price of orchids have dropped big time, I remember when they started at $75 for common ones. Here is my secret for after they are done flowering, I give them away .

 

[ninnymary]

Nyboy, do you guys have Trader Joe's out there? Their orchids are so cheap.

Mary

 

[Pulsegleaner]

Yes, yes he does (on Central Avenue)

The problem is that those orchids are, by and large Phalaenopsis (moth orchid) cultivars. Very very easy to grow in a lab, by tissue culture or seed culture, but not all that easy to get to re flower in a home environment (the Bassias (spider orchids) and Onchidium (those flattish yellow and red ones) aren't all that much easier.) So it might work as long as NY boy is committed to the "give it away when it runs out of flowers) tact, but should he ever want one long term, it might help to shop around.

There's actually an orchid seller that shows up at union square in NYC on Wednesdays. Almost bought one day before yesterday (little bitty thing with little bitty yellow flowers)

And yes I have tried temperate outdoor orchids too. None have ever grown here (well except for hellebore orchids, which grow pretty much everywhere with no intervention needed)

 

[Nyboy]

Yes Mary Trader Joes does have great orchids and some very unusual ones. Problem is the unusual ones sell out in about 2 hours from store delivery, One orchid loving clients made friends with one of store mangers he tips her off on when they getting new shipment. She has gifted me with some great plants. After about 2 hours of being put out only phalaenopsis are left. Home depot has cheap orchids but dyes them unnatural colors. What I found about a lot of cheap orchids are they need to be repotted in faster draining soil.One of the big upscale nurseries Nabel just went out and a orchids place took over.

 

[ninnymary]

When my stained windows were installed in my parlor, I treated myself to 2 doz. roses every week hat I placed in front of those windows. After a few months it became expensive so I switched to orchids. I only had to buy 1 orchid plant every 3 months. After it stopped blooming I tossed it and bought another. They were much cheaper than roses.

Mary