Garden humor thread..

[Rhodie Ranch]

Boris Johnson is out of ICU and is being rushed to a hair stylist.

 

[digitS']

@Rhodie Ranch that could be me ... we are exploring the ideas for DW (or, me!) to have my hair cut. DW does not like the idea of her doing it. I'm trying to come up with an idea but the best that I've got is a bowl over the top of my head ...

A duck walks into a barbershop.
''Got any grapes?" he asks the barber.
"This is a barbershop, we don't have grapes," the barber says. So the duck leaves.
The next day, the duck comes back and asks the barber, "Any grapes today?"
"I told you," said the barber. "We don't have grapes."
And so it goes - all week!
On Saturday, the duck comes back, "Any grapes today?"
"I told you," said the barber. "We don't have grapes. If you come in again next week, I'll nail your feet to the floor."
The duck comes back the following week and asks, "Got any nails?"
"No!"

"All right, then. How about some grapes?"

It's National Pet Day (@Xerocles )

digitS'

 

[flowerbug]

Mom buzzed my hair the other day with some clippers. that's what she does every month and a half or so. very easy. i don't care what i look like it's not like i look in a mirror all day...

 

[Dirtmechanic]

Boris Johnson is out of ICU and is being rushed to a hair stylist.

The real emergency!

 

[majorcatfish]

once this **** is gone, bet theres going to be a need for a lot more AA meetings.......

Alcohol delivery app Drizly says it saw sales explode in the last week of March, climbing 537% above the company’s expectations, which it calculates based on sales from the previous 8 weeks.

What’s more, 42% of those orders came from new accounts. In fact, the company says new buyers on the platform jumped 900% year-over-year. (The company, however, wouldn’t provide its exact revenue or user numbers.)

 

[Pulsegleaner]

once this **** is gone, bet theres going to be a need for a lot more AA meetings.......

Alcohol delivery app Drizly says it saw sales explode in the last week of March, climbing 537% above the company’s expectations, which it calculates based on sales from the previous 8 weeks.

What’s more, 42% of those orders came from new accounts. In fact, the company says new buyers on the platform jumped 900% year-over-year. (The company, however, wouldn’t provide its exact revenue or user numbers.)

This thing is having a LOT of weird effects on what people buy.

From my personal experience a seller of Fimo beads I use on Amazon has sold out and restocked THREE TIMES since this started (which would mean he was selling about 100 units in a space of time when he was selling 4 or 5 before this). My best guess is that a lot of parents who are desperate for something to occupy their kids are buying to give thier little hands something to do. I fully expect him to sell out for good before this is over (the beads are vintage so it's not like he or she can make more of them. I already wonder how he or she has gotten their hands on so many.)

 

[ducks4you]

Boris Johnson is out of ICU and is being rushed to a hair stylist.

He needs to do his hair like Trump, then they can both take a selfie together...like Viking twins.

 

[ducks4you]

How did Ancient Romans cut their hair?









With a pair of Caesers.

 

[Pulsegleaner]

It is an interesting thought to consider that, while the Caesar salad isn't named after Julius Caesar, there really isn't anything in there that would not have been available (in its season) to him. Romaine lettuce (hell the name means "roman") croutons (just toasted seasoned bread) hard cheese, eggs, lemons, pepper, anchovies........you could make one back then, if it occurred to you.

 

[Carol Dee]

An Easter greeting from my Sister she does NOT like Rabbits....can't ya tell!