Tired of friends/neighbors who are newbies to gardening telling you How to garden?

ducks4you

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I am getting WEARY of listening to some folks around me who are reporting,
"Why, I NEVER grew anything before. I found a pepper spoiled in my fridge and I planted it and got LOTS of peppers from it!"
"It Just HAPPENED." Gosh, this is SOOOO EASY."
You Want to tell them that they accidentally fermented the seeds in their fridge and it was a fluke.
You Want to be around when their zucchini suddenly dies next year bc of borer or squash bugs.
You REALLY want to tell them how much time you spend preparing your beds, building structures, etc. bc YOU'VE been around the block with gardening failures.
I guess I'll be around in a few years to hear them say that they are tired of it and will go to the store from now on.
I'll take their canner jars, etc, for free in the future, when they give That up, too.
2 years in a Row with weird.
Anybody else experience this?
 

flowerbug

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no, we don't have many people brave enough to comment because my reply is that they get a valid opinion after about five years of gardening here (and not someplace else). our soils can be competely different than the soils of gardens a quarter mile in any direction. the same with the microclimate. we get fogs and frosts in this lower area sometimes that won't show up in other areas right around us. etc.

i've gardened here long enough to know how to cope with it, but i can even still be surprised.

there was no rain in the forecast this morning but it rained for a while and then cleared up. sunny now. it's almost time to get back out there and get more garden put up for the winter. i can't go all day. the ground is very wet and heavy, but about three hours is enough.
 

digitS'

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It just goes in one ear ... and out the other, for me, Ducks'.

:) I've noticed that people tend not to speak casually to me. They probably realize that they may have to repeat themselves ;). I know that when I say something in an offhand manner, if I have to repeat it or just run it thru my mind later, I often regret having said it.

Just say, "Huh?" And, watch for the expression of dismay on their faces as they hear themselves repeat it ;). You won't even need to shrug your shoulders but remember to turn away if you can't help but grin.

Steve
 

catjac1975

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I am getting WEARY of listening to some folks around me who are reporting,
"Why, I NEVER grew anything before. I found a pepper spoiled in my fridge and I planted it and got LOTS of peppers from it!"
"It Just HAPPENED." Gosh, this is SOOOO EASY."
You Want to tell them that they accidentally fermented the seeds in their fridge and it was a fluke.
You Want to be around when their zucchini suddenly dies next year bc of borer or squash bugs.
You REALLY want to tell them how much time you spend preparing your beds, building structures, etc. bc YOU'VE been around the block with gardening failures.
I guess I'll be around in a few years to hear them say that they are tired of it and will go to the store from now on.
I'll take their canner jars, etc, for free in the future, when they give That up, too.
2 years in a Row with weird.
Anybody else experience this?
Sorry no. I have never er met anyone like that.
 

Pulsegleaner

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I have a gardening cousin who for year could not get why his garden did so well each year and mine struggled so badly. He attributed it to my odd choices of seed and kept exhorting me to use more conventional ones. Then my dad finally explained how we have no sunlight, so that is super acid (from all the hemlock needles) and hordes of ravenous critters I can't do anything about. Then my cousin apologized.
 

R2elk

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I am getting WEARY of listening to some folks around me who are reporting,
"Why, I NEVER grew anything before. I found a pepper spoiled in my fridge and I planted it and got LOTS of peppers from it!"
"It Just HAPPENED." Gosh, this is SOOOO EASY."
You Want to tell them that they accidentally fermented the seeds in their fridge and it was a fluke.
You Want to be around when their zucchini suddenly dies next year bc of borer or squash bugs.
You REALLY want to tell them how much time you spend preparing your beds, building structures, etc. bc YOU'VE been around the block with gardening failures.
I guess I'll be around in a few years to hear them say that they are tired of it and will go to the store from now on.
I'll take their canner jars, etc, for free in the future, when they give That up, too.
2 years in a Row with weird.
Anybody else experience this?
Not a problem for me. I always get the "Why is your garden so nice?" or How did you get it to grow that big?" questions. The other comments I get is "Your garden always looks so nice."
 

R2elk

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no, we don't have many people brave enough to comment because my reply is that they get a valid opinion after about five years of gardening here (and not someplace else). our soils can be competely different than the soils of gardens a quarter mile in any direction. the same with the microclimate. we get fogs and frosts in this lower area sometimes that won't show up in other areas right around us. etc.

i've gardened here long enough to know how to cope with it, but i can even still be surprised.

there was no rain in the forecast this morning but it rained for a while and then cleared up. sunny now. it's almost time to get back out there and get more garden put up for the winter. i can't go all day. the ground is very wet and heavy, but about three hours is enough.
I never follow weather reports. My weather rock tells me how things are. Yesterday morning it was wet. Yesterday afternoon it was white and later it completely hid. Today it is wet again from all the melting snow.
 

Artichoke Lover

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My standard response to that kind of advice gardening or otherwise is a “I’ll think about it”. That said, my more pressing issue tends to be my dad. He is often tries to help by “weeding” which usually ends with as many plants dead as weeds. He used to think round up wouldn’t kill food plants because he saw the farmers spray it on the round up ready corn. My pumpkins didn’t survive that year.....
Also my mom apparently thought potatoes were frost hardy perennials which led to a fight about why I wouldn’t plant her potatoes in November.
I love them and they are both very smart but neither of them know much about gardening.
 

Zeedman

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I've only heard such comments online, from people who don't know me, or have never seen our gardens. Usually those are advocates that follow a particular garden philosophy with religious fervor, to the exclusion of anything & anyone who gardens differently.

Those who actually see our gardens just say "thank you" and leave with a bag of veggies. ;)

Sometimes new gardeners are full of exuberance, and just want to share the joy over their latest discovery. I try not to be rude or discouraging, because I've been there myself (and really, I'm still there). A good gardener is always learning, and sometimes a tidbit of knowledge can come from even the most inexperienced. When I meet a new gardener, what I see is hope for the future... and maybe the best thing to do is listen politely, and offer encouragement.
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